Review – Howard the Duck

Treasure this moment. Rare indeed is the universally-reviled movie that’s actually as terrible as it’s supposed to be (if not more so). Lonely boy nerds will no doubt glom onto the pathetic, freakish protagonist, or at the very least derive snickering dateless wonder glee from watching lingerie-clad Lea Thompson come dangerously close to adding literal meaning to the nonsense phrase “fuck a duck.” Even though I’m a strident opponent of animal cruelty, I found myself genuinely hoping for the slow, painful death of this foul fowl. I’d rather watch two hours of AFLAC ads than sit through this stinker again. Wish I’d skipped it