Review – Skinwalker

This is one of those crappy indie productions where it looks like all the actors brought their own costumes. At least it gave everyone an excuse to wear their Apple Cider Days outfits more than once a year. Assholes disturb a Native American burial ground, releasing a demonic curse that seems tangential to the bickering and other awkward character interaction that serve as the movie’s true reason for existence. Perhaps it’s for the best that they made no meaningful effort to make this scary, because all the attempts at horror (especially the monster makeup) were so inept that they turned to comedy. See if desperate

Review – The Stand (2020)

So if they remake this once every 30 years or so, I could be dead before they do it again. In fairness, this one isn’t too bad (other than the tacked-on ending, which was nowhere near good enough to sustain an entire additional episode). Whoopi Goldberg in particular is aptly cast, and the rest of the that-guy-from-that-thing actors do their jobs well. Production values are good, and for something this long it doesn’t start to drag too often. My only objection is about the faithful rendition of Stephen King’s famous source novel. The story pits self-consciously multicultural, liberal suburbia against anything that isn’t that. The good part is that it makes the story anti-white-supremacist. The bad part is that it also gives it an anti-LGBTQ flavor. Mildly amusing

Review – Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

Like the recent seasons of Saturday Night Live, this movie depends heavily on stunt casting rather than good writing. The production sports plenty of expensive effects and cameos from other parts of the MCU (and points more distant). But beyond that the plot wanders between alternate realities until it runs out of excuses for meandering. With all the talent in the cast they could have made something much better. See if desperate

Review – Sonic the Hedgehog 2

If you liked the first one, odds are you won’t object to this one too strenuously. The speedy blue hedgehog is back, pitted against the manic return of Jim Carrey reprising his role from episode one. This is a finest moment for nobody in the production, especially Idris Elba, who is starting to look like he might be sharing an agent with Nicolas Cage. See if desperate

Review – Logan

The most bankable member of the X-Men slowly sputters out in this grim little action movie. Wolverine struggles to survive and care for a senile Professor X in a largely post-mutant near-future world. But when a member of the next generation – pursued by sinister government agents – gets dropped at his doorstep, it’s back in the saddle again. The new kid is more than a little reminiscent of Eleven from Stranger Things, which helps make her the only really sympathetic character in the story. Beyond her arc, this is a familiar mix of growling and fighting. Mildly amusing