... and Zombies

For reasons known only to the American book-buying public, a tome known only as Pride and Prejudice and Zombies has resided on the best-sellers list for some time now. I haven’t read it (nor do I intend to). For all I know it could be a work of staggering genius. It could also be a cheap trivialization of Jane Austen by the slap-dash addition of flesh-eating, ambient corpses. As we will soon be treated to another gift from the same publisher entitled Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters, I'm guessing the latter is probably the case.

This suggests no end of possibilities for other empty-headed combinations of literature and movie monsters. I’ll let you form your own impressions about what the following eight books might be like.

• The Moon and Sixpence and the Bride of Frankenstein
• A Streetcar Named Dracula
• Madame Bovary Versus Godzilla
• Romeo and Juliet: Rise of the Lycans
• Dr. Dolittle and Mr. Hyde
• Invisible Man Meets The Invisible Man
• Lady Chatterly’s Creature from the Black Lagoon
• The Canterbury Tales from the Crypt

I can't wait for this trend to spread to textbooks. As a once-upon-a-time Art History student, I'm especially hopeful that some enterprising publisher will turn his seven-year-old kid loose on Gardner's Art Through the Ages and re-release it as Art Masterpieces and Moustaches.