Review – Begotten

Okay, let me see if I can sum this up for you. Some guy sitting in an empty house cuts his own guts out. They dribble all over his feet accompanied by the sound of flatulence. A woman appears from behind his chair. She gives the corpse a hand job and impregnates herself. She gives birth to a skinny, bald adult who seems to really enjoy flopping around in the mud. Black Sabbath (or is it the bad guys from Phantasm?) shows up and starts hitting Flopsy in the crotch with sticks while he honks up buckets of guts. Mom shows up and drags sonny off, but Black Sabbath catches up to them. They kill Mom, pummel her crotch with giant Q-Tips and make her into a stew. Then they come back for Flopsy. Then something else happened, but by that point the movie had already used up more than an hour’s worth of grainy black and white film stock, a healthy dose of nerve-grating ambient noise, and pretty much all my patience. The guy who directed this went on to make Shadow of the Vampire, which should give hope to talentless indie art posers everywhere. For the rest of us this is fertile mockery bait but not much else. Mildly amusing