Review – Legion of the Dead

Do six mummies and a reanimated nekkid Egyptian queen really constitute a legion? Perhaps they should have called it “Legion of the Plot Holes So Huge You Could Build a Pyramid in One.” Low production values. Virtually script-free. Zach “Gremlins” Galligan and Bruce “Not Mark Hamil” Boxleitner were the acting highlights, and the director took pity on Galligan and killed his character off early. The rest is strictly amateur hour, with a handful of “college students” stumbling around a story that has something to do with bringing aforementioned queen and minions back from the dead to rule the universe or some such. The only real distinction here is that this has to be one of the all-time worst sound jobs I’ve ever suffered through. The dialogue is whisper-quiet, requiring viewers to turn the sound up so high that loud sound effects (particularly the apropos-of-nothing thunderclaps that frequently punctuate scenes) become eardrum-destroying assaults. Other than that, if cheap gore and a minimal number of bare boob shots float your boat, then prepare for your boat to be floated. Otherwise avoid with care. Wish I’d skipped it