Review – Twists of Terror

Twists of Tedium is more like it. Even the Canadian government ought to be able to recognize something so obviously designed to fail that it really shouldn’t be permitted to take advantage of the Great White North’s policy of liberal tax write-offs for film flops. Perhaps in place of the tax credit the guys who made this stinker could look for scientific grant funding under the pretext that this was an evil experiment seeking to determine just how many tiresome clichés could be built into a single made-for-cable fiasco. Sure, all three of the tiny tales of torpor feature the title-promised twists, but all one needs to do in order to stay ten or twelve steps ahead of the writers is to imagine that the plot is going to proceed in the most predictable, least entertaining course available to it. Even the sex probably won’t impress anyone who’s ever actually gotten laid. So even if it’s on for free, just pretend you don’t see it and keep on surfing. Wish I’d skipped it