Review – Arlington Road

Is terrorism expert Jeff Bridges being driven mad by the death of his wife and/or the class he teaches at George Washington University, or are his Cleaver-esque neighbors – Tim Robbins and Joan Cusack – really secretly part of a cabal of mad bombers? Although just about everyone in this movie has done quality work in the past, somehow this particular effort never quite manages to come together. The plot is at best mildly intriguing and at worst meandering and dumb. The sound is a particularly glaring example of the recent trend toward whispering half the dialogue and shrieking the other half amid over-wrought car chases and gun battles. Any film that involves extensive reference to both Washington D.C. and Kansas really has to work to get out of my good graces, but this one pulled it off. Mildly amusing

Review – In Cold Blood

Robert Blake’s “Little Rascals” face makes him all the more chilling as psychopath Perry Smith in this screen adaptation of Truman Capote’s famous non-fiction novel about the Clutter murders. When trying to get a real feel for the setting and the times, it may help to be from Kansas or at least be familiar with the landscape and its inhabitants. The print I saw was also extremely dark and the sound somewhat inconsistent, though I’m not sure if that was a problem with the film itself or just the copy I saw. And though some of the techniques are a little dated, it’s still nice to see a movie that assumes the audience has at least a little brain power. Worth seeing

Review – The Unnamable

The Unwatchable is more like it. Here’s yet another bad monster movie that loosely bases its action on a short story by H.P. Lovecraft. And as usual for films in this sub-genre, the film-makers manage to capture the ridiculous gothic conceits of Lovecraft’s stories, weave in some cheap nudity, and ignore most of what made the author’s work worthwhile. The makeup effects are under-utilized, which is probably for the best because they’re pretty cheap. I guess if you’ve got a craving for a run-of-the-mill college-student-croak-a-rama, you could do worse. Of course, on the other hand you could do better. See if desperate

Review – An Officer and a Gentleman

Every once in awhile Hollywood comes up with a fairy tale so sappy that it actually kinda works. This is one of those occasions rare. Richard Gere stars as a rugged, individualistic Prince Charming of humble origins. Our hero is trying – as are most of the other characters in the film – to subdue a fire-breathing reptile in the form of drill sergeant Lou Gossett Jr. Cinderella Debra Winger rounds out the cast. The romance here is of the most sexist variety, with pretty women working dead-end jobs in a dead-end town until their officer candidate beaux take a break from machismo contests long enough to sweep them off their feet. Though the plot journeys nearly as far from politically correct as it’s possible to get, the film is nonetheless an entertaining bit of brain candy. Mildly amusing

Review – Practical Magic

Sisterhood is beautiful. Sisterhood is powerful. And apparently sisterhood is even more beautiful and powerful if it can help you get rid of an abusive jerk and find the man of your dreams. Amazing how women with a genetic gift that allows them to actually perform feats of magic can’t find a spell powerful enough to make their lives complete without men, abusive or otherwise. This film will no doubt end up standing a lonely vigil in the “romcoms with a feminist slant” section of the video store. See if desperate

Review – Dr. No

Here’s the one that started it all: the very first James Bond movie. It’s almost hard to believe that Sean Connery was ever this young. It’s also amazing how many staples of the series aren’t present; particularly noteworthy is the absence of exploding briefcases, ejector-seat cars or any other kind of super-spy gadget. It’s also interesting to note just how bad the production values were back in the early 60s; this film features some of the cheapest effects and worst day-for-night ever preserved on celluloid. Sadly, the sexism and racism endemic to Bond movies is also here in full force. So if you like Bond movies, this one’s a must-see as a historical curiosity if nothing else. Mildly amusing

Review – The Siege

Here’s a busy little film. We’ve got all kinds of things going on here: international terrorism, civil rights violations, racism, inter-agency conflicts in the U.S. intelligence community, crosses, double-crosses, and triple-crosses until you can barely keep track of it all. The result, not surprisingly, is a muddled mess of a movie. Though I agree with the film’s overall message (to the extent that it could be discerned), I thought it was a bit heavy-handed. Further, the characters’ motivations were frequently less than clear, particularly among the supporting cast. For example, it’s never made completely clear whether the sinister general played by Bruce Willis is engaged in a deliberate plot to subvert the Constitution or whether he merely takes advantage of a bad situation. Overall this isn’t a terrible film, but it probably would have been better with a little less ambition. Mildly amusing